Dan's Top Video Game Baddies

Most of my list comes from Nintendo games, since those are the systems I tend to own.

10. Francis: Super Paper Mario
Super Paper Mario is filled with fun characters (although they do tend to go on talking for too long). Francis is the funniest one I've encountered so far. He is an obsessive collector, especially of items relating to the Mushroom Kingdom version of Battlestar Galactica. Francis is so nerdy that he has to turn the game into an RPG so that he is more comfortable talking to Peach. Francis flips out when asked a question that isn't one of the game's options, and the team of Mario, Peach, and Bowser must fight him. The fight itself isn't the best, but everything leading up to it is gold. The funniest moment is definitely when Francis is scrolling through his options and he hovers on "Smooch" for a few seconds before choosing to "Look' at the "Hot Babe.'



9. Helicopter: Call of Duty 4
There is nothing more terrifying than the thumping sounds of an enemy helicopter in Call of Duty 4. These bastards pack powerful guns, always know where you are, and are hard to shoot down. Josh, Brett, and Kevin can attest to the fact that I hated these things so much I would focus on killing them rather than other players.



8. Insanity: Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem
This game starts out in 26 B.C. as the Roman soldier Pious Augustus is corrupted by an Ancient God. In the year 2000 A.D., Alexandra Roivas finds an ancient book in her grandfather's house that tells Augustus' story as well as those in other time periods. You get to play as each multiple characters, in different time periods, as Alexandra reads about their fight to stop three gods from taking over the universe. As the player encounters bad guys, their sanity meter drops; this causes various tricks on the mind: the volume meter may begin to go down, it may appear as if your save data is being erased, bugs show up on the screen, your character explodes, monsters appear out of nowhere, and many others.

There don't seem to be any good videos of insanity effects, so here is a fan-made trailer I found:


7. Las Plagas: Resident Evil 4
These baddies start out as typical zombie-like creatures, albeit slighlty more human. These guys reach top ten status when headshots no longer drop them and instead shoot giant spiked tentacles out of their necks. From then on, headshots become a calculated risk; they could drop the zombie in one shot, but chances are you will just have to deal with a horrible tentacle of death.



6. Majora: The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
Majora is a mask that possesses its wearer and gives them the power to do evil. In this game, the mask takes over the innocent Skull Kid and forces him crash the moon into the world of Termina. At the end of the game, Link finds the mask embodied in the form of a child who is ostracized and lashing out on the world.





5. Metroid: Metroid Series
Metroids belong to the tiny, hard-to-shoot category of villains also populated by dogs, those crab things in Half-Life, and the Flood. Although these guys aren't too dangerous in the Metroid Prime series, their shriek still sends chills down my spine. I always hated encountering these baddies, even though I often dispatched them with ease.



4. Donkey Kong: Donkey Kong
He may be a good guy now, but DK got his start by kidnapping Mario's girlfriend and carrying her up a construction site. Donkey Kong is one of videogames greatest villains mostly because he is part of the difficult elevator level. I hate those springs!



3. Bowser: Mario series
Bowser shows up as the main villain in most Mario games, despite having been constantly defeated over the last twenty years. His motives are usually a bit vague, but it's excusable because who doesn't like beating the crap out of this guy? One of the more exciting battles with Bowser occurs in Super Mario Galaxy:



2. 12 year olds: Any online game (especially Halo)
These squeaky-voiced bastards are whiny, selfish, racist, and homophobic. They will berate you before every match, and drop out if they begin to lose the game. I've had some on my own team who killed me because they wanted the Warthog I was in! Their worst offense is always vetoing the first choice of game, regardless of what it is. When I'm excited for a game of Slayer, they inevitably veto it and we play Oddball or something equally horrible. It's the worst.



1. Ganon/Ganondorf: Zelda series
Some of the best boss battles of all time have been against Ganon. Endowed with the Triforce of Power, Ganon tries to take over the world by capturing the Triforce of Wisdom and the Triforce of Courage from their holders Zelda and Link. One of the coolest fights is in Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker: Link and Zelda must work together to defeat Ganondorf as Ancient Hyrule floods around them.